Nathan goes to the dentist

I have been writing a lot about mental health lately, so today I turn my attention to oral health. Oral health is very important.

(Must suppress inner 12-year-old boy's desire to laugh at the word oral.)

When it comes to my own oral hygiene, I think I'm doing a fairly adequate job. I brush twice a day and floss every night. I go to my twice-a-year dental checkups. (Sad reality: Now that I'm a mom, I kind of find dentist appointments relaxing. I get to be by myself, lying down and watching the Food Network.) And, I mean, not to toot my own very pathetic horn or anything, but the hygienist rated my brushing skills "good."

But when it comes to oral hygiene for my kid, I have failed on many counts. First there was the part where it didn't occur to me until he was well over one year old that I should be brushing his teeth. And even then, I didn't brush his teeth every single day. I remember leaving for a week-long trip when he was about 16 months old, and I questioned whether I should even pack the kid's toothbrush.

And nowadays, I do make him brush daily, but I usually just let him do it himself without supervision. Which is awesome, because three-year-olds are super great at all personal grooming tasks, especially those requiring fine motor skills. I always have really high aspirations of helping him brush his teeth, but toothbrushing occurs at a time when his stubbornness level is high and my patience level is low. And so if he comes to me with a smear of toothpaste on his face and tells me he brushed his teeth, I just call it good.

Plus it doesn't even matter because I'm still letting him drink a cup of milk after he brushes his teeth anyway.

Perhaps out of fear of being judged by dental professionals, I put off my kid's first dental visit. I remember at my regular checkup in November 2009, the hygienist told me that Nathan was ready for his first visit.

We had his first visit yesterday, December 13, 2010.

The cocked head makes him look angry and/or dubious, but really he was just watching Dinosaur Train on the TV. Good timing.

Anyway, we got to the office early, because I thought it would be a good idea to let him play with the toys in the waiting room first. I warned him that when his name was called, he would have to put the toys away.

And then his name was called, and here is what happened: He actually put the toys away. All of them. Without a battle. And he made sure the lid was closed on the toy box.

I knew right then that Dentist Nathan was a totally different kid.


And he cooperated with every single request to say Awwwwww and turn his head for Mr. Thirsty. He let the woman stick that pick in his mouth and didn't complain, which clearly must mean that they weren't doing it as hard as they do on me, because Mother of God that thing is a bitch. It totally ruins an otherwise relaxing trip to the dentist.

After he got his teeth painted with fluoride and picked out a toy, I took him to McDonald's. This was allegedly a reward for going to the dentist, because I like to create a new generation of people who reward themselves with food. In actuality, I took him to McDonald's because they have an indoor playground, and I thought the boy needed to run around a little after all that dental chair time. Much as I hate to admit it, McDonald's is kind of a major winter hangout for us, especially in December when the mall playground is so crowded.

So, even though it was like 2:00 and we had already eaten lunch, Nathan wanted a Happy Meal. I suspect he wanted it chiefly for the Transformers toy, which is the boy-oriented toy they are giving out right now. The girl-oriented toy is a Hello Kitty watch, which I told him he should get because I likes me the H.K. He said I could get that toy in my Happy Meal. I said I wasn't going to order a Happy Meal. "Fine," he said, "You can get a Sad Meal." No, no thanks, I'm trying to quit eating Sad Meals. I got a hot-fudge sundae instead.

And I brushed my teeth afterward.