Let's be prompt!

It's a dark, snowy day, and I'm snuggled under a blanket listening to sad music. I'm still struggling with a mental health downturn, but I am hoping I'm at the tail end of it. Anyway, this doesn't feel like the day to be funny.

Rather than bring you down with some pathetic attempt at introspection, I decided to turn to the NaBloPoMo prompts page for inspiration. You are supposed to write a whole post about each prompt, but since I'm sort of behind, I thought I would cover a number of prompts in one post. I'll just stop when I get bored and/or interrupted. I'll list each prompt with the day it was presented on the NaBloPoMo site.

12/10: Name three things you're grateful for, and three things you want in your life.
Grateful: (1) My family, (2) Health, (3) The ability to express my emotions. Want: (1) Better control over my mental health, (2) Better willpower when it comes to food, (3) Fewer friends struggling with financial problems next Christmas (though I don't know if that counts as being in my life).

12/9: What one thing are you often tempted to lie about? When do you think it's okay to lie?
Hmm, I'm a terrible liar, so I usually don't try. I did lie to Nathan's preschool last week when I called and said he was sick and wouldn't come to school, when in actuality I was taking him to the 1800baskets thing. That was just to the random receptionist who answers the phone at the park district though, not to his actual teacher. I copped to my lie later on with his actual teacher, who asked him if he was feeling better. (Stupidly, he just said "yes." He had no idea what she was talking about, because at least I didn't tell the lie in front of him.) But I do think it's okay to lie to kids about Santa. Some parents aren't comfortable with lying about Santa, but I have yet to find an adult who resents his/her parents for lying about Santa. I think believing in Santa is a fun, magical childhood experience that kids should get to have.

12/8: What do you think happens after we die?
You get buried. Or cremated. There is a funeral. People are sad. As for the whole afterlife thing, I haven't really figured out what I believe about that. All I can say is I definitely don't believe in hell.

12/7: Are you a competitive person or not? What helps you refocus and/or work harder when you find yourself slacking off?
Part 1: Am I a competitive person? Hahahahahaha. HA. When I swim at the gym, I can't help but be happy if I swim faster than the person in the lane next to me, even if that person is 75 years old. I can get scary competitive, but for the most part I try to avoid situations where my competitive nature is going to rear its ugly head. That's why I don't like hanging out with moms who always want to compare their kids' milestones to your kid's. Part 2: What helps you refocus and/or work harder when you find yourself slacking off? Why would I want to work harder?

12/6: Which of your senses means the most to you?
I really think the only correct answer here is vision. Loss of vision would be the hardest to overcome. I feel kind of bad saying that because I don't mean to imply that it's easy to be deaf or something like that. The loss of any sense would be hard. I just think not being able to visually comprehend my surroundings would be the hardest for me.

12/3: If you could erase one type of animal from the face of the earth, what would it be?
Insects with a lot of legs. What is it with the multi-legged insects that makes them so creepy?

12/2: What's the most dangerous thing you've ever done?
I don't balance my checkbook.

12/1: If you could stop your body from aging at any point in your life, what age would you want to stay at and why?
Well, obviously I'd want a body in its early 20s. I would want a mind that is much, much older. That's allowed, right?

11/30: If you could call any living person for advice today, who would you call?
Well, I think in actuality, your close friends and relatives would probably give you better advice than some stranger, because they know you better. But since this is a sort of fantasy question, I guess I should pick some famous person who I wouldn't normally have access to. So I pick Tina Fey for comedic advice and Brooke Shields for mental health advice.

11/29: If you could have worked for anyone in history, in your field, who would you choose and why?
What field am I in? I used to be a teacher, but I don't think I'd want to work for any famous teachers. Like, Annie Sullivan? Would that mean I'd have to go live in the olden days? Jaime Escalante? Would he want to work with some dumb white girl who doesn't understand calculus? He'd be all, "Dude, I got these low-income kids from an urban school to pass the A.P. Calculus exam, twice because the first time they were accused of cheating. And you stupid-ass suburban white girl of privilege, you got a 2. Clearly you don't have the ganas! Get out!" No, no famous teachers. And after teaching my field was publishing, and I'm not sure I know any famous people in that industry. William Randolph Hearst? I've toured his house twice, and the indoor pool haunts my dreams. Plus I was in educational publishing, not newspaper publishing. Now I'm a mom, and is that really a field? Who is a famous mom? June Cleaver? Florence Henderson? And I fancy myself a bit of a comedian, but would any famous comedians want me working for them? Okay, Tina Fey. I pick Tina Fey again. That way I wouldn't have to go back in time and live at a time when women were oppressed and a lot of people died of cholera. And she would use some of my jokes in 30 Rock.

11/26: What's the worst joke you've ever heard?
Most of the ones featured on Popsicle sticks.

11/25: Who are you closer to, friends or family?
Family. Family is always going to be there for you.

11/24: What turns you on, excites you, makes life worth living?
Obviously, your family makes life worth living. That's a no-brainer. But I'm excited by other things, most notably writing. Doing my daily blog post is the best part of my day. Sometimes I'm actually sad when I finish it, which probably explains the length of some of the posts.

11/23: What's on your wall: prints, posters, photos, paintings? What makes you want to hang something up?
I think maybe I've reached an age where things on the wall have to be framed. We have two cool reproductions of vintage posters (framed) that are advertisements for California tourist attractions. The picture that occupies the coveted over-the-couch spot is a painting of a train. Obviously we also have many framed family portraits. As for the second part of the question, What makes you want to hang something up?, the answer is, the impending arrival of guests who we don't want to know that we have had pictures sitting on the floor waiting to be hung up for months.

11/22: Tell us about what you're wearing today. Where'd you get your shoes? How long have you had that tie? Is that your grandmother's watch?
Whoa, NaBloPoMo, you are way off. I'm not wearing shoes, a tie, or a watch. I'm wearing my pajamas, and not even cute pajamas, because all of those are in the wash. Right now I'm wearing old pajama bottoms and one of my husband's white t-shirts.

11/19: Write the first paragraph of your autobiography.
Why are you reading my autobiography? What have I done that's remotely interesting? It's laughable that I would think I was worthy of an autobiography, and even more laughable that there would be a publisher actually willing to publish it. But assuming that I did write this autobiography and somebody did publish it, shame on you for wasting money on it. I hope you at least got it from the library, or in e-book form so no trees had to die for this drivel. Please stop wasting your time reading this right now, and instead go do something meaningful like playing with your children or volunteering for a charity.

11/18: Link to three posts that you've loved this month written by other people, and tell us why.
1. This hilarious post over at Amalah about the stupid stuff people write on pregnancy message boards, 2. My friend Katie's post about the, umm, different food preferences in other countries, 3. My friend Carolyn's post mocking those annoying Christmas card letters.

Whew! That's 17 prompts! I'm done! Have a good Sunday, everyone!