AHHHHHHHHHHHH!

It's the time of year when I'm supposed to be counting my blessings, but instead I find myself stressed out over petty stuff.

My parents left yesterday, and I feel oddly sad and lonely. Usually when houseguests leave, I'm able to say goodbye to them and then just step right back into my regular life. But my mom and stepdad were so helpful and fun to have around, and now I'm back to being alone and doing everything around the house myself. And also, I think it's a hard week to bounce back because we can't get back into our regular routine due to the holiday. All our activities are cancelled, and also I have this one day to turn around and prepare to cook my first Thanksgiving dinner.

I only have one other family coming over for Thanksgiving, so in total there are four adults, two extremely picky toddlers, and a non-eating infant. The baby is only 2 weeks old, so the whole thing is going to be extremely low-key and casual. Still, I'm freaking out! It seems like it's about the same amount of work whether you're having 4 guests or 20, and plus I have worked myself into a frenzy wherein I believe that a failed Thanksgiving dinner is a fate worse than death.

Last night I sat down and, in true Shannon fashion, began by writing the name of each Thanksgiving dish on an index card. Then for each item, I researched online and elsewhere, and made a list of all the ingredients needed, going through my pantry to see which items I already had. Except what if I check off "brown sugar" for the yam casserole but then also need a bunch of it for the pumpkin pies, and I run out? Having to go back to the store on Thanksgiving day, that is a fate worse than death.

Anyway, I got worn out halfway through making the index cards, and abandoned them and went to bed. That's right, I got tired just making the grocery list. So today I have to finish the list, shop for all this stuff, make the brine for the turkey, get it marinating, and make the pies. And clean the house, pick up dry cleaning, and do my Weight Watchers weigh-in. Luckily I am taking Nathan to daycare today.

And what happens after Thanksgiving? Christmas. Friday we're getting out the decorations. Oh, and I don't have tickets to go to California yet. I can't get husband pinned down on the dates for the trip.

And there's the shopping. The wrapping. The stupid hot stores with eight million people you want to kill. (And yes, I will do some online shopping, but sometimes you just need to go to a store for inspiration.)

These are all the stupidest problems ever. I am so lucky to even be in a position where I can complain about these things. And tomorrow, on Thanksgiving day, I promise to do a post where I write about all the things I am truly thankful for.

But I'll tell you one thing today, I'm thankful for coffee.